week one:come

empty.

waiting to be filled.

the manger is empty.

there is no ONE in it.

it is waiting to be filled.

filled by a PRESENCE.

THE Presence.

one little candle burns brightly.

in the quiet of the evening.

first lit by a young girl.

she attends to the linens and the wreath.

careful that things are just so.

these rituals take effort. and time.

two things that seem to be very sparse around here lately.

simplicity is the key word this year.

the house looks so bare .

all of the festive fall clutter is gone. stashed away in boxes. tables and shelves have been stripped of many beloved knick knacks.

i want our hearts to soak up the nakedness.

so that when He does come we are not already full….

happy first week of advent friends.

i hope you are all well.

hospitali-tea & gratitude

my parents have been stopping by unexpectedly a lot. perhaps because it is the halfway point between their house and my grandma’s.

i love them dearly and have found that one of the ways i can best serve them right now is by having some of their favorite things on hand.

for my dad: ginger green tea. peppermint chocolate bars. and homemade rosemary bread. for my mom: joy tea. a sweet treat. usually some kind of bread like panettone and she likes the peppermint chocolate bars too.

indulgent, yes.

but i was always taught that charity starts at home.

i think we’ve all put on a few pounds.

isn’t it ironic that one of the ways we humans best show our love is by feeding the ones we love.

perhaps it is because it is our God’s way too.

and as His children, we try, in our own feeble way, to do what HE does.

feeding the hungry. giving drink to the thirsty.

when i visit my grammie i always try to take her one of her favorite foods. this morning it was warm sweet potatoes with milk. cinnamon. and brown sugar.

comfort food.

she savored every bite.

i know because i had to feed her.

but it breaks my heart to see that as a fallen away Catholic she is starving for the True Food.

the Bread of Angels.

the Food for her upcoming journey.

it breaks my heart that she never returned to the Church.

and that now her faculties are fading.

i always wanted a grand reversion.(that’s the word i use for people who used to be Catholic.)

a triumphant return to the faith.

 for all of the other fallen away family members to see….(and possibly attribute to my shining example as a faithful Catholic?)

pshaw.

pride is so sneaky.

so subtle.

so subtly sneaky….

i. i. i. i.

i know that what transpires next is between her and God.

i am grateful for the faith that she gave to my mother.

who in turn passed it on to me.

i only wish that she could’ve been afforded the grace. peace.

and comfort of a happy death.

i. i. i. i.

it’s not about me though…

God is merciful.

and we should never stop praying for the ones we love.

“let us never look for the result of our efforts for others. it is good for us not to know it, for if we did, pride in doing good, the most subtle pride of all, might follow. let us entrust to God the prayers, sacrifices, and efforts that we make, without looking back at what we have already done. let us continue to work and act for our brothers and sisters and for the coming of God’s reign in them….a simple human connection can sometime be the best sermon; a spark can ignite a great fire.”

~elizabeth leseur

even if we may never know the final outcome.

finally, i am grateful for your sweet prayers and words of encouragement.

maybe someday this blog will return to a less thoughtful spot….

until then, happy. happy. thanksgiving friends.

wishing the best to you and yours.

i’ll definitely be feasting on some humble pie these next few days…..

chasing november

and catching it now and again…

enjoying little bits of wonderfulness amid the busy. busy days.

the spectrum of needs is broad.

and oh.so. delicate.

my heart is being stretched in so many different ways right now.

the struggle to be so many things to so many people is an awfully overwhelming task.

one that is best pondered in the early morning stillness at mass.

alone.

as often as i can steal away. that is where i go.

for answers.

to little things.

like chasing november.

a month that has sped past my very eyes with lightning speed.

shorter days.

leaves swirling outside. 

falling gracefully.

like snowflakes.

scattered all over the yard.

little things like how i feel a lot like one of those leaves on the ground.

scattered. trampled. dirty. worn out.

saddened by a diagnosis of leukemia for my grandma.

that’s a big thing.

she is deteriorating so rapidly.

thankfully there is still some shade from the tall. strong. elm.

planted firmly.

towering.

and it offers solace.

solace that makes me content to be grounded.

grounded in a faith built on a rock.

content in knowing that all i have to do is look up.

for all the answers.

fall-ing

and love-ing it.

the food. the colors. the sunlight.

watching my children. cheeks rosy. gathering leaves for the mantle. chasing crickets.

a chill in the air.

but with warmth in our hearts.

because Our Lord is so generous in the gifts He gives to us each and every season.

making home: the color orange

it is still lingering here and there.

the color orange.

like in that curtain on the door that goes out to the laundry room.

the paisley print is vintage. from the fifties. my grandma gave it to me. and i actually first made it as a witch cape for sophia when she was 4. i always wanted to do something more with it. and voila! now it is a curtain!

and there it is again on a little seasonal side table in the dining room.

i like how it adds an element of warmth.

the table and the color orange.

my mother will totally disagree with me.

she is a beige person.

thankfully that is one quality of hers that i did not inherit.

i am not afraid of color.

i even added a bit to my hair recently.

highlights.

they make me feel young again.

i promise i don’t have orange hair.

i am not that brave.

thank you alice, for reminding us to look at the little things that make a house a home.

now i’ve seen it all…

my husband has this thing with darth vader.

and it has only gotten worse.

getting directions will never be the same again.

ever.

well…

the owls are finished. this one was completely designed and sewn (mostly) by my very artistic girl. who is hogging  learning to use my sewing machine.

we’ve been devouring copious amounts of halloween candy pomegranates.

i am really surprised that all of the sugar vitamin C  hasn’t kept this terrible flu/cold bug from hitting us.

i am teetering on the edge of becoming its’ next victim.

you know how life is on the edge. your eyes are burning. no they are not. you are achy. but not too achy to play florence nightingale. you keep taking the strongest stuff in the house because you refuse to succumb!

you’d rather discuss butterfly watching.

and watercolors.

or finish rolling that ball of yarn so you can start a pair of handwarmers for yourself  for once.

but sadly, there just aren’t enough hours in the days.

i say days because it seems that lately i just can’t get my act together.

this is a season of “too many targets”, as fulton sheen says.

aiming at perfection in too many ways.

instead of THE only way that matters.

so in an effort to get through this season i am letting the winding down happen.

naturally.

beginning with ignoring my two-year blog-o-versary that just passed.

i went back to that first blog and noticed that the more things change. the more they stay the same.

briefly, the same-ness:

i was still shuffling clutter around. dealing with too much halloween candy. and thinking about the very controversial presidential election/voting issues.

the changes?

i don’t need here so much.

i am content to lurk in the blogosphere and soak up the good things.

but no longer do i compare myself to others who seem to have it together more than i.

this community is beautiful. wonderful. and i wish i’d had it when my kids were younger.

maybe i would’ve had more time?

however, not all that glitters on the internet is gold.

i don’t feel guilty anymore for lack of posts.

i am perfectly at ease just laying in bed next to warm toasty bodies instead of uploading and editing pictures into the wee hours in the morning.

i have come to terms with my gifts as well as my shortcomings and imperfections.

i am a better photographer.

a horrible knitter.

sometimes i have nothing to offer this blog.

and, well….

well, that is ok too.

case closed!