Archive for the tag “Catholic spirituality”

{heLLo may}

isn’t this a pretty LittLe card? i found it on pinterest yesterday and was gLad. it Looks Like something i wouLd Like to create if i had the time…

and this pretty LittLe may day basket…it was Left on my porch yesterdaymorning  by a dear friend….i wouLd Like to get my act together enough {someday} to Leave such sweet things on the doorknobs of my peeps.

i am proud to report that i have started a quiLt for my girL. {inspired by pinterest}. it is very simpLe because as noted….i don’t have room on my pLate for anything more compLicated than those compLicated things that i cannot do anything about…{i won’t mention any names or anything…but YOU know!!!}

i am much farther aLong in the process than these pictures…which is a good thing.

but it’s kinda fun to Look back and say WOW!!

…i gave the queen of the may the fLowers from that may day basket….wanted to give her something besides aLL my compLaining….

….i Love thee, Lady most worthy of aLL Love, mother of MERCY, powerfuL with God….

and just because i was taLking about pinterest….here’s one of those totaLLy siLLy e-cards that tickLe my funny bone on a daiLy basis….{and because this one is soooooo me…}

happy wednesday, friends.

 

 

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home again.

friday night the big boy came home. i should’ve posted that sooner, i know. but i’ve been so exhausted. and sLeep deprived. having a naughty teenager is Like having a newborn. onLy not nearLy as thriLLing…

today was better. which is saying a Lot for a monday.

i am trying my hardest to focus on good things. pretty things. positive things. Like LittLe boys who Like to eat their snack out in the tree in the backyard and a certain girL who is rockin’ some mint coLored toenail poLish…toes stiLL so cute i’d Like to eat them!!!

we are experiencing some gLoomy weather  which does not heLp my psyche…

but….apriL showers bring may fLowers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i wish i had some pictures to share, but i have been kinda Lazy in that department, taking mostLy pictures in this spot. it is way too much fun.

weLL, i am off to bed, friends. just had to say thank you for aLL your prayers, wise words and sweet thoughts. i know we are not out of the woods yet with this kid…i won’t every stop worrying about my kiddos. it’s what i do. i don’t know how to do anything eLse. and it doesn’t mean i don’t have faith in a GOD Who is bigger than aLL of this…it just means i am smaLL.

but i am smart enough to Leave everything in HIS hands. because that, too, is what i do….

that and wrap him in the mantLe of our bLessed mother…the safest spot i know for a young, vuLnerabLe man-chiLd…something sort of simiLar to the way i’d snuggLe him when he was a baby…

 

{i didn’t pray enough}

during Lent one day as  i was praying the stations of the cross, i meditated on Jesus speaking to the women of JerusaLem and His words struck me Like a reed. they struck me Like a reed because at that moment, which had to be one of His most painfuL because not onLy was He physically tired. bLoodied. bruised. faLLen…the weight of our sins coupLed with the weight of the cross was aLmost too much for even the Son of God to bear…and YET….and yet….He impLores the women to weep not for HIM…to weep instead for themseLves and for their chiLdren…

this afternoon as i foLded Laundry i did just that.

i cried because there is a piLe of cLothes that isn’t being cLaimed….there is a piLe of cLothes someone is not going to come and get, and take up to his room because he is not here….

this piLe of cLothes beLongs to my biggest boy. who after numerous chances. upon numerous chances. refuses to keep curfew and foLLow a few simpLe ruLes.

and this afternoon whiLe my sister-in-Law texted me a how-are-you-doing text {because she knows me too weLL} i found great peace in being “guiLt-free”. for 18+ years i have given that boy every good thing i knew how….the homemade birthday cakes and haLLoween costumes. stories and trips to the park, beach, etc. baseball and basketball seasons. piano and guitar Lessons. summer camps. pancakes with siLLY faces. green eggs and ham. icecream sundaes for dinner and shadow puppets….but then it donned on me….after….after i cLimbed off my pedestaL….and set my haLo down….

there was one thing maybe i didn’t do….maybe i didn’t pray enough.

when  a woman is deep in the trenches of motherhood it’s hard to pray.

when one is deep in the homeschooLing-mother trenches it’s even harder to pray.

i raised my first 3 kids with Little to no internet connection *gasp* {no bLogs. facebook. pinterest. twittering. etc.}  there weren’t a Lot of distractions. it was REAL. it was raw. it was bLoody, heavy and faLLen….and in retrospect….which is aLmost aLways 20/20….there are pLenty of things i didn’t do weLL…

but i am not posting this to get sympathy {aLthough there is nothing quite Like a famiLy catastrophe to get me writing again}….

i am posting this to say: weep and pray for yourseLves and your chiLdren.

we benefit from that weeping.

they benefit from that weeping.

read: sts. monica and augustine.

Our Lord, in HIS bLoodiest hour demands that we do so…..

and doing it whiLe you’re foLding the Laundry gets you credit too….that’s another thing i’ve Learned aLong the way…

“the ONLY thing that matters in Life is doing the wiLL of God…once you are doing the wiLL of God, then everything matters. But apart from the accepted wiLL of God, nothing has any Lasting reaLity. So if God wiLLs that you shouLd be bowed over the sink instead of over the pew in your favorite church, then washing dishes is for you, now, the most perfect thing you can possibLy do…..You wiLL be tempted to say that it is impossibLe to serve God whiLe worrying about the upkeep of a house; you wiLL teLL me that you get so irritabLe that you cannot see this principLe of substituting your present duty for the envied prayer time; you wiLL point out your inabiLity to direct your intention toward God when you are so exhausted that you cannot think….but none of these things disquaLifies….it can onLy be repeated that your WHOLE business is STILL to Look for God in the midst of aLL this…… ~HoLiness for Housewives

good-bye friends…i’m off to LOOK for Him…

i miss u too

dear bloggy friends.

i guess i lied when i said i was going to be here more often.

but then again when the walls came tumbling down i had to prioritize things around here a bit differently than i expected. literally. the walls in this 101+ years old house were falling down in places. which meant some demolition. and plasterers. and re-plastering. and texturing. and painting. and moving the furniture, beds, etc. every single morning so they could work and at night again so we could sleep.

see….not very exciting to blog about huh?

 

i really don’t have a lot to “show” for what i’ve been up to.

i’ve been working on being a better mama and wife.

more present and prayerfully aware of what everyone’s needs are. and they do change so often. we are a fickle lot.

trying to pray that rosary every. single. day. wrapping all my loved ones in the mantle of our lady.

is there really any safer place in this uncertain upside down world?

working on my marriage. yes, it needs work. sitting down with my husband and looking into his eyes when he comes home from a long day at work. listening to his concerns and cares. feeding him a good, solid meal. taking time to connect and talk and lay my head in the crook of his neck while we talk like lovers do…this is important stuff.

taking the time to do my hair and make up so that when said husband gets home, there is something besides “chaos” for him to look “at”.

and that goes for the house too. clearing the clutter. (he does hate clutter). and at this point so do i (excepting school papers, messes, those are sort of inevitable).

simplifying the things i can.

and simply leaving the rest to God.

and then there is the whole “trying to lose weight and get healthy” thing i’ve been tied up with. trying to eat gluten free most of the time. yet not “starve” my husband (or the boys for that matter) whose thoughts sort of go like this on a cold night (or rather any night): “honey, you really need to buy some hot cocoa with marshmallows and cinnamon graham crackers….”  while i am still reminiscing about the snickers he snuck into bed the night before. pleading with me to take just. one. bite.

without going into too much detail i have found that a lot, if not ALL of my depression, anxiety, irregular periods, infertility, weight gain, etc. etc. (health problems) is due to *gasp* my diet. (the fact that i LOVE food. and LOVE to cook does not help much either) so evaluating my relationship with food and eating has been an interesting, albeit time-consuming, tiring, difficult and expensive journey.

buuuuuuuut…..my LIFE depends upon it. so. it HAS to be done. and besides (me) i worry about my kids too…so making sure they are eating healthy and getting their vitamins and veggies. drinking disgusting green shakes for breakfast instead of plates filled with jelly topped scones and bacon + eggs on the side….the look on their faces really is priceless each morning. “don’t put spinach in mine.” “i hate coconut milk.” “that new shake powder you bought is disgusting.” are some of the things which would be overheard if you had your ear pressed to the outside of my kitchen door on most days of the week excepting saturdays and sundays. (i’m not so strict then!)

i finally finished my mother’s birthday scarf. (started sometime last year).

my mother, the artist. i can’t believe it has almost been one year since her accident. my how the time does fly….

i’ve been dillydallying with sepia tones a lot lately. it’s funny how even with all of the technological advancements in digital photography/editing i find that the lack of color in certain pictures to be so peaceful.

 color can be so noisy…..unless you are a fall tree in crowning glory, of course…

naptimes with a book resting on your chest….definitely a black and white moment. (this girl child is a book thief. we are immensely enjoying shirley jackson right now. short stories and spooky stories. spine chilling eerie written so craftily . but because we are “sharing” the book she often reads ahead of me and will text me little “hints”.  it’s driving me nuts because she has more time to read than i do!)

so i promise not to cram too much more into this post.

it is late and i have a list a mile long for the morning.

it was good to check in.

let’s do this again soon.

 

 

life according to aesop

sometimes i find myself feeling guilty that we are not more schoolish around here, but then my mind and heart are quickly put at ease when i remember the benefits of our Learning Lifestyle: children that are LIVING and LOVING. learning skills which have long-term effects and not just “sitting at a desk all the day long.” these children are gaining wisdom and knowledge. they are communicating with adults and peers and doing it well. they are learning what REAL life is all about. this is what education is all about. this is the REAL world.

i wish i could give credit to the author of those words. they are not mine. i found them around the same time that i found: fret not my soul, on God rely.

they were words that i needed during this particular point in my day. week. month. year. season.

the season wherein piano lessons and algebra. british literature and american government are added to an already busy schedule.

the season wherein the middle boy struggles to find a clear thesis statement. and the mama struggles with the overwhelming burden of just being the mama.

the mama whose clearest thesis statement would be that homeschooling and parenting are each a daunting task on their own

combine the two and, well, sometimes there is a spontaneous combustion of sorts.

and you just have to scratch everything you thought you knew and live life according to aesop: slow and steady wins the race.

because when everything blows up in your face and you sit amidst the wreakage of your illusions….there comes this wonderful sense of detachment from those illusions.

you know them too, don’t you? the ones of the perfect homeschool. the perfect life. the perfect marriage. perfect meals….a perfect house.

and you get a grip on the reality that is your life. and that life needs work. and unless that work is united to something greater. SOMEONE greater…then you might as well curl up in a ball and die.

so there are sticky oatmeal kisses. and close body contact during story time. an early morning coffee date with the husband. rubbing faces with a stubbly-faced man-child who has the capacity to make your blood boil and heart melt almost simultaneously.

fervor is renewed by seeing the baby walking around the yard with a pick ax slung over his shoulder. observing ants and fallen eggshells.

yes, finding that clear thesis statement is a struggle.

but anything worth doing well is worth the struggle, my father once told me.

a dear priest friend said to me just this morning that there is strength and courage in the Sacrificial Heart.

strength and courage.

more words that aren’t mine. but i would so like to make them my own.

slowly. steadily.

one step at a time.

that aesop!

stops and starts

i wanted to call this post: a nightbook. stealing the phrase from one of my favorite people. but i didn’t. because it’s not fair to steal other people’s ideas without asking first and since she is on the other side of the ocean that might take too long!

besides, given the nature of these photographs and what i wanted to talk about, stops and starts sounded more appropriate.

life is a  lot like these flowers. beautiful. promising. sweet-smelling. and colorful. and then it fades.

and then you wither. die. and end up laying on top of a piano?

no. really i was going somewhere with this. but i am extremely distracted by a new kitty. and the swooshing sound of pens on paper as the two middles lie on my bed next to me and draw. it really is a delightful sound. not distracting in a bad way.

the fact that my allergies are acting up really badly and i am typing with one eye closed could have something to do with the loss of my poetic train of thought.

i guess what i meant to say is when life fades. and loses color. buy a new one?

nope. not that either.

just buy some new flowers i guess.

i have nothing. as my husband says when he is at a loss for words.

except maybe this….

“she endured. and survived. marginally perhaps, but it is not required of us that we live well.” ~anne cameron

not my words. no.

but i like the idea of living well

something good to chew on as we head into a new school year.

a new season of  wonderful dead things which late summer and then fall brings.

a season of stops and starts of all sorts.

picking things up and putting them down again is good for the soul.

always praying for discernment.

for what should be stopped and started.

and for the courage to get back up when you fall down.

liturgically speaking, august began with peter in chains.

and immediately i could relate to those chains. bound. constricted. and many times because of my own pride. 

i can relate to so much about peter.

prideful.

willing to serve our Lord so readily, yet skulking away at the first sign of danger. hiding. denying.  

yet feeding lambs and fishing for souls.

these are all things i do.

or at least i try.

much like this prince of the apostles i try.

to do the will of God.

to say i love YOU with more than just my lips.

“not in the multitude of words but in the purity of heart.” ~st. benedict

but sometimes living well means being humiliated.

and even being crucified upside down.

by the world’s standards, no, that is not living well.

perhaps that is something we should all stop.

measuring ourselves by the world’s standards.

because much like that prince of the apostles i, too, am called by God.

to this particular vocation. in this particular home. in this particular family. at this particular point in time.

there are no accidents with God.

i may not be able to relate to the idea of being something solid. like a rock.

petra.

maybe i’m just simon.

without the peter.

nevertheless….”every VOCATION becomes more agreeable when united with DEVOTION” ~st. francis de sales

devotion to a SOMEONE.

WHO makes you believe you can walk on water.

even choppy waters.

cold? wet? tired?

those are perfectly normal feelings.

HE is still there to calm the storms.

 until we are ready to start again.

“Lord, save me!” the rock cried.

that just might very well be my motto for this 2011-2012 school year.

it worked for him after all.

so i sort of  found some of my words.

but now my foot is asleep…which is a hint that the rest of my body should be doing the same thing.

goodnight, friends.

i do so love that rosary, btw, barb.

it was just what i needed.

thank you.

 

three words

she is fine.

she is breathing on her own.

that’s six words.

thank you, doctor. three.

BLESSED BE GOD. three again.

THANK YOU, LORD. another three.

and finally: Jesus, i trust in YOU.

apparently people have simple surgeries all. the. time. in and out.

they cut you open and send you home almost as quickly as you zip thru a drive thru to order a burger and fries.

this is something that i, the super panicky type has trouble fathoming….i, who once called the paramedics (when this girl child was just a baby) because i cut her little fingernail and it wouldn’t stop bleeding.

me of so little faith.

i teeter at the edge of faithfulness. what can i say?

it’s a trust thing.

Lord, help me in my unbelief.

help me to trust even though i can’t see You.

now if you will excuse me i am going to take a very long nap while the patient and her big sis watch the king’s speech.

AND have a glass of wine later!

thank you, friends for all of your prayers and well wishes too….

dear july….

before i forget…and you are gone…

i wanted you to know that you have been so good to us.

with your cool mornings.

and your scattered wild sweet peas on the side of the road.

of course we picked a few. for our Sacred Heart Altar.

and of course there was that day at the beach…

filled with sand and seashells. the sun was hiding. and the roar of the ocean almost lulled me to sleep…

except there was so much to see…everyone made a new friend to play in the waves with. and then there were treasures to behold…

and then we tried those scones we heard about here.

they were absolutely deliciously lovely.

i was proud to perfect my hamburger buns recipe for the bread maker. quick. easy. and loved by all.

even the pickiest of eaters.

there is still so much i could i write about…but some things will just have to be our little secret…

and instead i will close with my favorite quotable that i read this month…i hope you will enjoy it too…

“one of the commonest natural experiences of the sense of loss is tiredness: it empties us out….it is useless to reproach a tired heart. and when we are tired out the only way to God is the simplest wordless act of faith. a woman too weary for articulate prayer will find that for her the best of all prayer is the unspoken act of faith in Christ in her children when she knows that  she is setting the table and baking the cake (or scones!!) for the Christ Child, her soul will be at rest.”

thank you, july magnificat for that.

those were soothing words to this weary mama.

happy weekend friends.

hope to see you monday.

with good news of a safe and successful surgery.

 

plain jane and some other things

i am not a plain jane.

who was i kidding?

and so i could not keep that “theme” i had up for those few days.

i might be moping a little bit.

i don’t want to…so i will tell you about that yummy bean dip instead.

very easy peasy. layer some re-fried beans.(heated slightly). (i mashed canned organic pinto beans for a quick fix) top w/ cheese. add a layer of sour cream and guacamole (ours is just mashed avocados, lime juice, crushed red chile pepper, garlic (fresh and powder) purple diced onions and roma tomatoes). then top with salsa (or more sour cream and cheese) and even some yummy, colorful bell peppers.

and how we went to see the ballet folklorico on friday night.

and how we even re-scheduled that darn surgery to see said ballet.

it was so important to her.

and i just may be spoiling her a bit right now.

like by ordering her a whole bunch of new books from alibris and b-n.

which books?

the incorrigible children of ashton place book one (which she already devoured but i want to read it aloud to the baby and not be in a big hurry to take it back to the library) and book two.

two penderwick books

and two callahan cousins books.

am i bargaining with God?

as in:”look Lord, please keep her safe, she has a bunch of summer reading to do!”

maybe.

pitiful of me, i know.

a very dear friend gave me a tight hug today when i expressed my crazy feelings.

 a dear priest friend annointed her with some holy oils and relic of the True Cross. (there IT is…so beautiful, huh?)

with saints and angels to pray for us….what more could we ask for?

i am so very thankful for the gift of our Catholic faith.

because faith is a gift.

a very special gift.

if you are a magnificat reader you remember these words from yesterday:

“it is the assurance of things not yet seen.” st. paul. hebrews 11:1

it is God saying:

come and follow ME into the darkness. I want to know you are ready to go into the things that you do not see yet, on faith alone.

a very important component of true love is: trust.

and i trust HIM.

with my life. with hers.

and with everyone and everything that i love.

because HE loved every bit of us first.

saint ann novena

DAILY PRAYER TO SAINT ANN

O glorious St. Ann, you are filled with compassion for those who invoke you and with love for those who suffer! Heavily burdened with the weight of my troubles, I cast myself at your feet and humbly beg of you to take the present intention which I recommend to you in your special care.

Please recommend it to your daughter, the Blessed Virgin Mary, and place it before the throne of Jesus, so that He may bring it to a happy issue. Continue to intercede for me until my request is granted. But, above all, obtain for me the grace one day to see my God face to face, and with you and Mary and all the saints to praise and bless Him for all eternity. Amen.

Our Father, . . . Hail Mary . . .

O Jesus, Holy Mary, St. Ann, help me now and at the hour of my death.

Good St. Ann, intercede for me.

 

 

FIRST DAY

Dear St. Ann, though I am but a prodigal child, I appeal to you and place myself under your great motherly care. Please listen to my prayers and grant my requests. See my contrite heart, and show me your unfailing goodness.

Deign to be my advocate and recommend me to God’s infinite mercy. Obtain for me forgiveness of my sins and the strength to begin a new life that will last forever.

Blessed St. Ann, I also beg of you the grace to love, to serve, and to honor your daughter, the most holy Virgin Mary. Please recommend me to her and pray to her for me. She refuses none your requests but welcomes with loving kindness all those for whom you intercede.

Good Jesus, be merciful to the faithful servants of Your grandmother St. Ann.

 

SECOND DAY

From the depths of my heart, good St. Ann, I offer you my homage this day and ask you to shelter me under the mantle of your motherly care. You know, good mother, how much I love you, how gladly I serve you, how happy I am to praise you, how eager I am to call on you in time of distress.

Good St. Ann, be pleased to extend your helping hand in all my wants. Listen to my prayers, for I place my trust in your gracious bounty. Make all my thoughts and desires worthy and righteous.

Jesus, I thank You for all the graces which in Your infinite goodness You have lavished upon St. Ann; for having chosen her, among all women, to be Your grandmother on earth and exalted her in heaven with such great and miraculous powers. In the name of her merits, I humbly recommend myself to Your infinite mercy.

 

THIRD DAY

Hail, good St. Ann, who first responded to the needs of Mary, Mother of our Savior and Queen of Angels. Hail to you and to your husband St. Joachim, who watched over her infancy, presented her to the Lord in the temple and, according to your promise, consecrated her to the service of God.

Hail St. Ann, good mother! I rejoice in the marvels you continually perform, because they encourage all to seek your intercession.

Good St. Ann, by the great power that God has given you, show yourself my mother, my consoler, my advocate. Reconcile me to the God I have so deeply offended. Console me in my trials; strengthen me in my struggles. Deliver me from danger in my time of need. Help me at the hour of death and open to me the gates of paradise.

 

FOURTH DAY

Good St. Ann, you offered your pure and holy daughter Mary in the temple with faith, piety and love. By the happiness which then filled your heart, I beg you to present me to your Grandson Jesus. Offered by you, I will be agreeable in His sight.

Kind St. Ann, take me forever under your protection. Deliver me from the temptations which continually assail me. Above all, attend me in my last hour. As I lie on my deathbed, be present with your daughter to console and strengthen me.

Holy Mary and good St. Ann, show yourselves to be mothers indeed by obtaining for me the grace of a good death. When my soul goes forth, lead it to God’s tribunal so that, by your powerful help and intercession, it may obtain a favorable judgment.

 

FIFTH DAY

Hail, all-powerful Lady. By God’s special favor, grant consolation to those who invoke you. Procure for them the eternal riches of heaven, and like a good mother, success in their temporal affairs as well.

Good St. Ann, obtain my deliverance from the punishment which my sins deserve. Obtain for me success in my temporal affairs; especially see to the salvation of my soul.

St. Ann, by your influence with Mary’s son Jesus, you have won the gift of conversion for many sinners. Will you then abandon me, who have chosen you as my mother? No, St. Ann. Your name alone, which signifies grace, assures me of the help of your prayers, and these prayers will surely procure pardon and mercy from Jesus. You will pray for me now and at the hour of my death.

 

SIX DAY

Good St. Ann, do not allow my soul, a masterpiece of God’s creative power, to be lost forever. Free my heart of pride, vanity, self-love. May I know myself as I really am and learn meekness and simplicity of heart.

God’s great love for me leaves me cold and unresponsive. I must reflect this love through works of mercy and charity toward my neighbor.

In your boundless charity, good St. Ann, help me to merit the glorious crown which is given to those who have fought the good fight against the world, the devil and the flesh. Assist me to preserve purity of heart and body. With Mary and her divine Son, protect me always.

 

SEVENTH DAY

Once again, Good St. Ann, I choose you for my advocate before the throne of God. By the power and grace that God has placed in you, extend to me your helping hand. Renew my mind and my heart.

Dear St. Ann, I have unbounded confidence in your prayers. To your blessed hands I entrust my soul, my body and all my hopes for this world and the next. Direct my actions according to your goodness and wisdom. I place myself under your motherly care.

Receive me, good mother. Cover me with the mantle of your love. Look kindly on me. By your powerful intercession, may I obtain from God grace and mercy. Obtain for me remission for sin and release from the punishment my offenses have deserved. Pray that I may receive grace to lead a devout life on earth and that I may obtain the everlasting reward of heaven.

 

EIGHTH DAY

Hail, St. Ann! I rejoice at your exalted glory. You gave birth to Mary, whose divine Son brought salvation to our lost world by conquering death and restoring life and hope to sinners. Pray to Him who, for love of us, clothed Himself with human flesh in the chaste womb of your daughter.

Glorious St. Ann, with your blessed daughter, deliver me from everything that is displeasing in the sight of God. Pray to your gentle and powerful Grandson that He may cleanse my soul in His precious blood, that He may send His Holy Spirit to enlighten and direct me in all that I do, always obedient to His holy inspirations.

Good mother, keep a watchful eye on me. Help me bear all my crosses. Give me the fullness of your bounty and sustain me with courage.

 

NINTH DAY

Good St. Ann, I have reached the end of this novena in your honor. I have asked and ask again. Good mother, let not your kind ear grow weary of my prayers, though I repeat them so often.

Bounteous Lady, implore for me from divine Providence all the help I need through life. May your generous hand bestow on me the material means to satisfy my own needs and to alleviate the plight of the poor.

Good St. Ann, fortify me by the sacraments of the Church at the hour of my death. Admit me into the company of the blessed in the kingdom of heaven, where I may praise and thank the adorable Trinity, your grandson Christ Jesus, your glorious daughter Mary, and yourself, dear St. Ann, through endless ages.

 c/o ewtn

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